Steve Flashman
Repeat Offender
Posts: 77
Because SOME short men have a Napoleon complex...
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« Reply #15 on: June 17, 2008 » |
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One I stole (or do you say plagiarised???) from Sandra on 'ere...
She said, "Ssssh..... Just let the poison do its job..."
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Re: Jokes
« Reply #2 on: January 24, 2006 »
Reply with quoteQuote
A man on his deathbed turns to his wife. "Before I die, I need to confess something."
She smiled at him. "You don't need to."
He replied, "Yes I do, so I can die in peace. I had an affair with your sister and your best friend." She said, "Shh, just let the poison do its job."
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« Last Edit: June 17, 2008 by Steve Flashman »
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"I take your point but don't you LIKE a challenge...?"
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Nubs
Hardened Forum Fiend
Posts: 3816
With friends like the BTZ's could I do any better?
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« Reply #16 on: June 18, 2008 » |
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"Never Too Late To Die"
by
Roger Newbury
"I'm dying!", she said. "I know!" He said, laughing hysterically.
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BTZer's are GGRREEAATT!  |
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Nubs
Hardened Forum Fiend
Posts: 3816
With friends like the BTZ's could I do any better?
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« Reply #17 on: June 18, 2008 » |
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"This is poison." "Damn, you caught me!" He moaned quietly.
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BTZer's are GGRREEAATT! |
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Sammo
Hardened Forum Fiend
Posts: 1827
I fell from grace and landed on my knees
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« Reply #18 on: June 18, 2008 » |
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I've got several stories that I'm entering... I just don't want to tell what they are yet. I've got one that's a sure winner.
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Jo K
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« Reply #19 on: June 18, 2008 » |
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I've got two, I like them but sure winners? Hmm Maybe....
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God doesn't deduct from our alloted life span the time spent drinking. oh and while I'm at it - READ THIS NOW! - http://jokawasaki.com |
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ravenscross
Hardened Forum Fiend
Posts: 2750
Read my tweets... on twitter
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« Reply #20 on: June 18, 2008 » |
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I'm going to cut up an award winning crime novel into single words, then pull out 10 randomly. Stick them together and then repeat until all the words are used up. Hopefully, I should get a winner that way.
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smudge
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« Reply #21 on: June 18, 2008 » |
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I have experience in this sort of thing, but am not quite as confident as Sammo. I have two I`m pleased with. But self satisfaction is never de rigeur in public is it?
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Sammo
Hardened Forum Fiend
Posts: 1827
I fell from grace and landed on my knees
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« Reply #22 on: June 19, 2008 » |
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I have experience in this sort of thing, but am not quite as confident as Sammo. I have two I`m pleased with. But self satisfaction is never de rigeur in public is it?
Must bite tongue... mustn't be tempted by smutty repsonse... |
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smudge
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« Reply #23 on: June 19, 2008 » |
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I thought the metaphor was clear enough!
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heavyd
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« Reply #24 on: June 19, 2008 » |
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I started one instead of dealing with some bank guarantees but then the bank rang up and I've haven't gotten back to it.
All a bit of fun! Must ensure I get one in though.
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"Let me clear my throat." - DJ Kool
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Steve Flashman
Repeat Offender
Posts: 77
Because SOME short men have a Napoleon complex...
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« Reply #25 on: June 19, 2008 » |
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Title: The Duel
Text: "I've loaded both pistols, Sir." "Unload one, my dear fellow..."
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"I take your point but don't you LIKE a challenge...?"
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Steve Flashman
Repeat Offender
Posts: 77
Because SOME short men have a Napoleon complex...
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« Reply #26 on: June 19, 2008 » |
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Title: Friends Like These
Text: Ross, Rachael, Joey, Chandler and Monica found murdered. Phoebe missing.
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"I take your point but don't you LIKE a challenge...?"
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Steve Flashman
Repeat Offender
Posts: 77
Because SOME short men have a Napoleon complex...
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« Reply #27 on: June 19, 2008 » |
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Title: A First Time For Everything
Text: This time Cain felt his brother had gone too far...
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"I take your point but don't you LIKE a challenge...?"
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Steve Flashman
Repeat Offender
Posts: 77
Because SOME short men have a Napoleon complex...
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« Reply #28 on: June 19, 2008 » |
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C'mon, they're not good, but hopefully they're inspirational..... (aaaargh!)
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"I take your point but don't you LIKE a challenge...?"
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Steve Flashman
Repeat Offender
Posts: 77
Because SOME short men have a Napoleon complex...
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« Reply #29 on: June 19, 2008 » |
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I'm going to cut up an award winning crime novel into single words, then pull out 10 randomly. Stick them together and then repeat until all the words are used up. Hopefully, I should get a winner that way.
Tried this..... Got: Elvis, killed... Nice toasty... Sucking noises... Plenty of bloating... Reaped. Title: The King Is Dead Not very good PLUS my copy of Death Message is bloody ruined..... I'd only got to page 272.... (It's late, I'm bored, I'm blocked, it's my girlfriend's birthday on Saturday and I'm working, my bosses want me to go on holiday during a bank-holiday weekend, and I've only just discovered that Mitch Hedberg died a couple of years ago... But enough about me... Did you change your hair???) X |
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"I take your point but don't you LIKE a challenge...?"
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